I always thought that Frankl line was about stoicism and emotional repression. Now I think it’s about understanding the message from an emotional catalyst…
Really thoughtful piece and there was much in this for me to personally relate to, especially coming off a less-than-stellar parenting moment as a result of festering anger leading to reactivity that just wasn't warranted in the situation. The connection between shame and rejection, especially in men, and its resulting violence is really astute. I think it's there for women, too, but our reactions tend more toward internal blame and violence toward self. In general, I have had less reactive moments since I started working my dreams with Natural Dreamwork.
Thanks so much! I was intrigued that the biggest shame trigger for women is APPARENTLY physical appearance. Which makes sense even if it's pretty depressing too.
"Whether or not the critics prove to be correct, the tone of some of their reactions is almost more interesting than the content." - reminds me of some of the reactions to the ACX post about jhanas ;)
Indeed, this was extremely relatable. And in particular, your comment about the left hemisphere's rebellion against the right was so fascinating! It connected me to the essence of that rejection anger. Such a raw, often subterranean emotion... Thank you, I always look forward to your posts and podcasts.
Thanks Yasmine, it’s nice to have a direct connection to readers when you publish something like this. I hit send before I’d really edited it in case I got cold feet…
Tom, I’m grateful Frederik featured you, and this essay of yours in his post. (I was dumbfounded to be featured as well. Frederik is one of my idols.)
You laid yourself bare and that is the essence of the finest of writers in my opinion. It reflects depth of soul and purity of heart. I look forward to reading more of your work.
Also, your wife and daughter are lucky to have someone as self-aware as you are.
Thank you for such an honest piece.
Finished "East of Eden" for the first time a couple of months ago and it was fantastic - especially characters of Samuel and Lee.
"Timshel" is a beautiful reminder about free will - like Viktor Frankl's: "Between stimulus and response there is a space."
I always thought that Frankl line was about stoicism and emotional repression. Now I think it’s about understanding the message from an emotional catalyst…
Thank you for writing such a beautiful and honest piece. It's inspiring to see you talk openly about all that you've been through.
I've been going through a bit of a rough period myself and your content helps me keep moving forward.
"When you're going through hell keep going"- was the mantra that helped me. Nothing to do but keep on. And that's enough. Love to you.
Thank you! That's a great mantra to keep in mind. Love to you as well.
Keep producing the spectacular content that you do!
Love this, Tom! Felt this one right in my gut 🙏
Hard to write, so thanks.
Really thoughtful piece and there was much in this for me to personally relate to, especially coming off a less-than-stellar parenting moment as a result of festering anger leading to reactivity that just wasn't warranted in the situation. The connection between shame and rejection, especially in men, and its resulting violence is really astute. I think it's there for women, too, but our reactions tend more toward internal blame and violence toward self. In general, I have had less reactive moments since I started working my dreams with Natural Dreamwork.
Thanks so much! I was intrigued that the biggest shame trigger for women is APPARENTLY physical appearance. Which makes sense even if it's pretty depressing too.
Stunningly beautiful writing. How you bring us through your honest revelations to share highly relevant nuggets of wisdom-bombs. ❤️
Thank you. I’m somewhat pleased to people find it readable, as I had to hit send before I changed my mind…
Beautiful. Honest. Vulnerable. Learning from you, Tom.
Tom, your essays, courageous sharing, and authenticity has been of great solace to me lately. Very thankful to have found you here.
Thanks Erin- it gives me comfort that it landed. I had to hit send before I got cold feet so it wasn’t as edited as usual….
Beautiful, Tom.
"Whether or not the critics prove to be correct, the tone of some of their reactions is almost more interesting than the content." - reminds me of some of the reactions to the ACX post about jhanas ;)
Any higher intelligence is the great western taboo
...And thank you for giving me my next reading in Sheldrake's piece. These recommendations are very valuable.
Thank you! That sun essay has been on my mind constantly
Indeed, this was extremely relatable. And in particular, your comment about the left hemisphere's rebellion against the right was so fascinating! It connected me to the essence of that rejection anger. Such a raw, often subterranean emotion... Thank you, I always look forward to your posts and podcasts.
Thanks Yasmine, it’s nice to have a direct connection to readers when you publish something like this. I hit send before I’d really edited it in case I got cold feet…
Happy you did!
This was great and had me thinking about it afterwards! Inspired to go read East of Eden now.
Thanks man. East of Eden is one of those books that make you weep as a writer that anyone else could be so good at it.
Thanks for sharing your experiences with such honesty. I'm sure we can all relate to varying degrees!
Ha- I actually hope nobody can relate, but I'm glad when people do.
Radical honesty. So much more powerful to connect with fellow human struggles. Brave - well done.
Tom, I’m grateful Frederik featured you, and this essay of yours in his post. (I was dumbfounded to be featured as well. Frederik is one of my idols.)
You laid yourself bare and that is the essence of the finest of writers in my opinion. It reflects depth of soul and purity of heart. I look forward to reading more of your work.
Also, your wife and daughter are lucky to have someone as self-aware as you are.
Ha- thank you, VERY much